Amy Glass is apparently a pretty important person that she can judge a whole segment of society. Her blog post titled “I Look Down On Young Women With Husbands And Kids And I’m Not Sorry”, and can be found here, although I hesitate to send more people to her site. Here is what I think about her post.
I do think that someone who stays at home with the kids and takes care of the house is on equal footing with someone who works outside the home. I can only assume that Mrs. Glass has no children. If she did, she would realize that raising them is a fairly important task(read the MOST important task). Maybe she believes, like so many others today, having school teachers raise their children is the best way to do things. I respect any person’s choice to either work in the home, or outside of it. I have no way of knowing a specific families situation, but to argue that the raising of children is less important than making money is preposterous. Obviously Mrs. Glass has chosen a career outside the home as the correct choice for her. Our family has chosen to have someone stay at home with the kids. But I would never “look down” on someone who chooses a different path.
You are right about marriage and the ability to parent, or as you put it being “able to get knocked up”, being average. Anyone can do it. But anyone can also build a rocket. That’s not to say that the rocket won’t blow up in their face. Just as marriage or parenting can blow up in your face if you don’t take it seriously, plan for the future, and put a lot of care into it, treat it like a job even. Because it is a job. They are the two most important jobs in the world. The fact that more than half of the marriages in this country end up in divorce really illustrates the point. Being in a committed and loving marriage, is a lot of work, and something that SHOULD be celebrated. That is why you see people having milestone anniversary parties, it is a big accomplishment. Just as taking time to be a good parent should be celebrated. Don’t get me wrong, if you hike across Asia and want to throw a party for your amazing achievement, kick up. Send me an invite and I’ll make sure to write a nice card and bring you a nice bottle of wine. I’ll be ecstatic for you, seriously I will. But being a good husband/wife is no less a feat. By the way, I know plenty of people/families who throw big parties when someone graduates college, graduates from medical school, or throws other parties for major accomplishments. Amy, maybe you just aren’t getting the invites because you seem like kind of a downer.
And you are again right that it would be harder, or near impossible, to hike across Asia after having kids. To me that is a reason to celebrate marriage/parenthood all the more. What an amazing self sacrifice you are making for the betterment of another. I honestly can’t think of better examples of love than to donate of yourself for another.
By the way Mrs. Glass, I am a stay at home dad and I will be happy to talk to you about how hard it is to manage a household. It’s ridiculous. Did I mention I started and owned a business before getting married and having kids. While managing schedules, employees, customers, paying taxes, purchasing product, managing payroll, etc. was difficult, managing a household full of kids isn’t even close, not by a longshot. But as for satisfaction, my current occupation, vocation rather, has far more of it. Schooling, playing, disciplining, nurturing, encouraging, and teaching, along with a host of other responsibilities are far more rewarding. Along with my wife, I am helping to raise four (soon to be five) amazing people.
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention my wife is a doctor, I’ll give you two guesses which job she thinks is more important in the grand scheme of things. At this point you should only need one.
I make it a point not to look down on ANYONE. I can only imagine you aren’t married and don’t have children. So I am sad for you, that you would think so little of a huge group of people that do so much for their families. I don’t pretend to hope to change your mind, my guess is you will never read this because it doesn’t have the shock value your blog does. I can only pray that some day you are able to experience the joy that I find being a lowly house husband.